I know the Super Bowl isn't till tomorrow, but I'll be away from my computer after midnight so here this is now. Anyway I wanted to post this in celebration of the Super Bowl. There is a church about a mile from my house, and they always put up wacky and incredibly corny messages on their little board. Things like "If God is your co-pilot, swap seats!", for example. Anyway, my friend and I found this brilliant little number posted up there last year the week of the Super Bowl.
"Let's Meet At My House Sunday Before The Game - God." I don't know, that seems a tad sacrilegious to me. Seems like making up a false quote from the holy spirit himself, the almighty God regarding some petty event like the Super Bowl would piss off some of the more uptight humorless church goers. (Of course, I'm not saying all churchgoers are uptight and humorless, I'm talking about the small percent of Ned Flanders-like people who actually exist.) Isn't that kinda like skipping school and then forging a sick note from your mom? You know, if I were actually sick, this is what my mom would write on the note. Well, have fun watching the game, those of you that do. I don't really care for either team, but I'm going with The Bears for two reasons. 1) Those Da Bears things with Chris Farley were pretty damn funny and 2) When playing against The Colts in Madden, Peyton Manning takes like 35 seconds to snap the ball on EVERY SINGLE PLAY and it drives me completely insane. I'm just sitting there staring at a bunch of computer guys standing still for the better part of a minute. After 30 plays, that adds up. Snap the damn ball, asshole! Okay, I know that's the most ridiculous reason anyone has ever had to want a team to lose a game, but it's really all I've got.