You Know You're A Monster If...

Growing up in the late 80s and early 90s I was always a big Mad and Cracked magazine fan. Re-reading a lot of issues now I realize that I probably didn't really get a lot of the jokes, but I never hesitated to bug my mom to pick up a new issue any time I saw one at Safeway or Crown Books. As a young horror fan as well, I absolutely lost my mind any time Mad or Cracked had a horror-themed article. Would you call a 3 or 4-page segment of a comic an article? That doesn't sound right, right? 

So, as I'm going through these comics for the first time in years I'll probably post some of the more horror-centric articles here. Articles. That still sounds weird to me.

From issue 257. Featuring art by Gene Colan (co-creator of Blade!), written by George Gladir. Credit to the scanner of this issue.

Hear Some Tracks From Waxwork's Friday the 13th & Chopping Mall Scores

Waxwork Records is set to put out vinyl releases for Harry Manfredini's Friday the 13th and Chuck Cirino's Chopping Mall scores this summer, and they revealed the new cover art and some sample tracks over on Fangoria the other day. Read on below for more details and the sample tracks:

Friday the 13th features include liner notes from director Sean Cunningham and composer Harry Manfredini, a heavyweight tip-on-old-style gatefold jacket featuring full artwork by Jay Shaw, and a printed 12”x12” insert with artwork by Jacqui Oakley. Releases August 29th

Vinyl details include: Camp Blood vinyl: Woodland Green and Brown haze with Blood Splatter Crystal Lake vinyl: Deep Murky Green Crystal Lake Blood Filled vinyl (limited to 100 units)

Chopping Mall packaging details include 180 gram fluorescent pink vinyl housed in a heavyweight tip on jacket with film laminate gloss finish. A limited run of 500 neon yellow with neon green haze variants will be available via Waxwork Records. Full package artwork including a 12” x 12” inserted art print has been created by Australian artist duo We Buy Your Kids. Chopping Mall will be out a month earlier than Friday the 13th, on July 29th.

Preorder Crystal Lake Memories Today!

Crystal Lake Memories, the massive 7-hour documentary on all things Friday the 13th will be released in a 3-disc Blu-ray/DVD combo pack this August 27th and you can put in your preorder now. If you're considering picking this up it's best to order now because all preorders through the official site will come with an exclusive bonus disc featuring 4 more hours of material.

CRYSTAL LAKE MEMORIES: THE COMPLETE HISTORY OF FRIDAY THE 13TH
3-Disc Blu-ray™ / DVD Combo Pack

• Runtime: 420 minutes
• Single-Disc Blu-ray / Two-Disc DVD
• 16:9 widescreen / Color
• 5.1 Surround audio
• English and Spanish subtitles (main feature)
• Region free
• MSRP: $29.95 USD


• BONUS DVD with approximately four hours of extended interview material from cast and crew spanning the entire Friday the 13th film franchise and television series, available ONLY when you purchase directly from our website!

Buy it now, but be warned, it's got a death curse.

Warner Brothers to Release The Complete Works of Jason Vorhees on Blu-ray

The good news is that Warner is finally getting off their asses about putting the rest of the Friday the 13ths out on Blu-ray. Not just the first 8, all 12 movies featuring Jason. The bad news is that I have to own a copy of Freddy vs. Jason. That one wasn't great to begin with, but it's held up way worse than any other Friday the 13th movie. Still a small price to pay for such an amazing box set. Below is a look at the set from Shock Till You Drop:

"On September 13th, Warner Bros. Home Entertainment will provide plenty of blood-curdling thrills when Friday The 13th: The Complete Collection debuts on Blu-ray. For the first time, all twelve Friday the 13th films will be packaged together, (with seven of them making Blu-ray debuts) as a result of a strategic distribution alliance between Paramount and Warner announced last fall, granting Warner exclusive video distribution rights to over 600 Paramount titles. The set also includes a Friday The 13th Killer Extras Bonus DVD.

This intense 'slasher' series is one of the longest-running and most successful horror franchises in film history, surpassing the domestic theatrical box-office grosses of such legendary series as A Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The film that turned psycho killer Jason Voorhees and his infamous hockey mask into a pop culture icon has also bested the horror competition as the #1 home entertainment seller, with total sales of $119.7M to date.

The 10-disc collection ($129.95 SRP) includes the twelve films on nine Blu-ray discs, as well as a killer DVD bonus disc full of special features on the making of the famous franchise. The must-own set will be presented in a collectible tin case with 11 hours of previously released special features and a 40-page soft cover book. The book is excerpted from Crystal Lake Memories: The Complete History of Friday The 13th, a fan-favorite volume that's viewed as the ultimate memoir of the series, and highlights some of the 200 interviews, 600 photos, storyboards, concept art and more. Also included is a brand new, official Camp Crystal Lake embroidered Counselor Patch.

Friday The 13th: The Complete Collection also includes digital versions of all 12 films with UltraViolet, allowing viewers to download and instantly stream the films to a wide range of devices from computers and compatible tablets to smartphones, game consoles, Internet-connected TVs and Blu-ray players.

One of the most frightening franchises in film history, Friday The 13th focuses primarily on the character of Jason Voorhees, who drowned as a young child at Camp Crystal Lake due to the inattentiveness of camp counselors. Many years later, the camp becomes the scene of a number of murders - all of which are either committed or motivated by the avenging Jason, who forever lurks at Crystal Lake with his finely-honed machete.

Films in The Collection include:
· Disc 1 - Friday the 13th (1980)
· Disc 2 - Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)
· Disc 3 - Friday the 13th Part 3 in 3D (1982)
· Disc 4 - Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (1984) NEW TO BLU-RAY
· Disc 5 - Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning (1985) / Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986) NEW TO BLU-RAY
· Disc 6 - Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988) / Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan (1989) NEW TO BLU- RAY
· Disc 7 - Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday (1993) / Jason X (2002) NEW TO BLU-RAY
· Disc 8 - Freddy vs. Jason (2003)
· Disc 9 - Friday the 13th (2009) (Theatrical Version and "Killer Cut" Extended Version)
· Disc 10 - Killer Bonus DVD Disc

Friday The 13th: The Complete Collection (BD)
Street Date: September 13, 2013
Order Due Date: August 9, 2013
Rating: R
Pricing: $129.95 SRP
Cat. #: 100040897"

Miguel Nunez + Jere Fields' Friday the 13th Part 5 Disco Remix

What the hell, lets make this a whole day of 13th related posts. If you're looking for a quick two minutes of comedy check out this fan-made video of a beautifully disco-fied duet by Demon and Anita from Friday the 13th: A New Beginning. Friday 5 gets a bum rap but I absolutely love it. This might cause some to question my horror fan credentials but it's my current favorite of the bunch (seriously).

Check it out below. Prepare to dance.

Crystal Lake Memories: The Complete History of Friday the 13th

In other Jason related news, this August be on the lookout for a gigantic 7 hour(!) documentary on all things Friday the 13th. From Friday the 13th: The Film Franchise:

"With a running time of approximately seven hours, Crystal Lake Memories: The Complete History of Friday the 13th explores each film -- from the seminal 1980 slasher hit to the 2009 reboot, including the hit syndicated television series -- in chronological order, and promises to be the definitive retrospective on one of the most enduring horror franchises in motion picture history.

Writer/director Daniel Farrands says, "I'm very proud that my passion (and obsession) with all things Friday the 13th, which started when I was 12 years old, has finally come full circle.  What started out as a pipe dream ten years ago when I first teamed up with Peter Bracke on his incredible book, has taken on a whole new life with our companion documentary.  I hope fans will be as thrilled as we are with this epic look back on the Friday the 13th series."

With such a massive run time, Crystal Lake Memories will be released on Region Free Blu-Ray only as the DVD format is not only out of date and going extinct in the near future, but the ability to offer the entire documentary on fewer discs will make for a more enjoyable viewing experience.

Thommy Hutson shares his sentiments about his journey with the project.

“I am thrilled that the show has come together so beautifully,” says producer Thommy Hutson. “After a year of production, so many amazing, new interviews, and locating incredible materials, Crystal Lake Memories will absolutely be the embodiment of ‘definitive’ when it comes to telling the story of the Friday franchise, not to mention bringing Peter Bracke’s amazing book to life. We couldn’t be more excited to unleash this incredible history of Camp Crystal Lake, Jason, and all that has gone with them over the last 30 plus years.”

You will be able to preorder it July 8th, official release date is set for August 27th. The official site is yet to be launched but to keep up to date until then just check out their Facebook page. I never got around to seeing their Elm Street doc Never Sleep Again, but I'll definitely be grabbing this when it's released.

Friday the 13th: The Game: The Action Figure from NECA

Here's something ridiculously cool I found over at Figures.com. NECA is set to release a Comic Con Exclusive action figure based on Jason from the highly inaccurate (zombies? children killing?) and infuriatingly difficult Friday the 13th NES game.

I was a horror fan first and a Nintendo owner second so Friday the 13th was the first Nintendo game I ever owned - excluding the Super Mario/Duck Hunt that came with the system. Friday the 13th was also the first game to ever make me so angry that I threw a controller across the room, which is not a good thing to do when the controller has a wire that is plugged into a console. This is why I don't play video games, I'm not good at them so my rage always ends up outweighing any fun I might be having playing the game. Still, I'd love to pick one of these up, unfortunately I'm thousands of miles from San Diego, so I don't think I'll be getting one any time soon.

Jason vs. Leatherface Comic Book Mini Review

This is Topps Comics' (you know, the baseball card/stale chewing gum people) 3-issue miniseries Jason vs. Leatherface. In one corner the Chainsawing Cannibal Bubba Sawyer. In the other corner, the Mongloid Marauder Jason Vorhees. Who will survive and what will be left of him? You'll have to read and find out.

Each of the 3 issues features an incredible cover by Simon Bisley with interior art by Jeff Butler. Nancy Collins is credited as the writer

For even more Jason and Leatherface fun, be sure to check out some of the fan made stuff on YouTube. Apparently, if you know two tall fat guys, live near the woods and own a hockey mask from the 70s and a chainsaw you can make your very own Jason vs. Leatherface movie. Sumbitch

Friday the 13th: Bloodbath

I recently got some more recent horror comics in CBR format. Stuff like Texas Chainsaw and Nightmare on Elm Street and the like. Thought I'd put some up and see if anyone is interested. This is the Friday the 13th Bloodbath 3-issue series from Avatar Press. If you guys want to see the Nightmare or Chainsaw series let me know, if not some more Creepy can make an appearance. In keeping with the NC-17 nature of the site these are for Mature Readers only due to scenes featuring tremendously over the top gore, boobs, brief man ass, premarital fornication, and girl on girl action. Oh, and did I mention the tremendously over the top gore? Throughout the 3 issues here several teenagers are dismembered, cut in half, or impaled, often mid-coitus (not unlike the scene in Friday the 13th part 2, a scene they blatantly stole from Bava's Twitch of the Death Nerve). Only it's much more gruesome here. But, like I mentioned it's very over the top so it ends up being pretty comical seeing how carried away the artist got, with blood and guts flying every which way in every single death.

Alice Cooper - He's Back (The Man Behind The Mask)

Found this on a forum I visit and thought it'd be fun to share. This is Alice Cooper's video for He's Back (The Man Behind The Mask) from Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives. The quality isn't that great, I don't think it was ever released on a video or anything, so this was possibly recorded off of TV back in the 80's and saved from a YouTube upload, then converted to an MPG file. But, it's very cool seeing the video now. You get to watch a fake audience watch the movie, then suddenly Jason bursts through the screen. Corny in all the best possible ways, and you even see Jason throw a headlock on Alice Cooper at the end.

For those of you keeping track, this is my favorite Friday the 13th film. Possibly due to the fact that the movie stars Thom Matthews from my favorite movie ever, Return of the Living Dead. Plus the super cute Megan character was very, well cute, and funny. In fact I actually liked all of the characters, which is very rare for a slasher film. You even get to see Horshack get iced! But most importantly, the movie was just really, really fun. But it still had a little bit of a mean streak in some of the death scenes. I honestly wish we'd get more fun horror films today instead of all these damn depressing torture movies they keep churning out. Those can be good, but sometimes you just need something fun.

Anyway, the video, have fun:
http://lix.in/2dec96

Welcome to New York

This is a limited edition soundtrack of both Friday the 13th pt. 7 and Friday the 13th pt. 8. Here's the info I have on this one: "New digital recordings of the original scores from the motion pictures FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 7: THE NEW BLOOD and FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 8: JASON TAKES MANHATTAN, starring Kane Hodder as Jason Voorhees, everyone's favorite camp counselor from Camp Crystal Lake, featuring music composed and performed by Fred Mollin (FOREVER KNIGHT, FRIDAY THE 13TH: THE TV SERIES)."

Yes, Jason was a camp counselor, that's accurate.

Part 7 was fun, one of my favorites even. I thought the Carrie girl vs. Jason angle was pretty entertaining because it gave someone a chance to try and mentally kick his ass with objects, instead of just shooting at him 4 times, realizing he's not phased at all, then shooting at him several more times. (See the rapist guy in part 8 for an example)

Part 8 introduced the Jason road trip idea , taking Jason on a fun little vacation. To New York City, for like, I don't know, about 12 minutes or so. I don't know if I'd count that as "taking Manhattan". He killed what, 3 or 4 New Yorkers? 2 of them being rapists. So really, not such a bad guy after all. Even showing a slight sense of humor by scaring some hooligans by lifting his mask to reveal his hideous face. It just goes to show that even a zombified mass murderer whose only goal in the afterlife is to kill the hell out of as many people as possible for no real reason likes to have a good time once in a while.